Executive presence remains associated with hard edge – to be seen to be dealing with issues and people in an often harsh and cutthroat way, sometimes resulting in public humiliation or metaphorical blood on the walls. Organisations regularly allow sharp, tough people who bully and cajole to remain in positions of power. They unwittingly condone a toxic behaviour with negative longer term consequences. In the end, the press coverage on the ‘Fred the Shreds’ of this world (Fred Goodwin, former RBS CEO’s moniker)far outweighs that of anyone upstanding.

It is easy to feel hopeless in this context. Yet, as John D. Rockefeller has been quoted as saying “Good leadership consists of showing average people how to do the work of superior people”. Effectively to lift people and get the most out of them you can’t belittle them – you need to convince them they can fly.

I find it curious when early career people say they just couldn’t stomach being at the top because of the behaviours they witness from their own leaders. Actually, the true emerging executives are persistent, and find ways to credibly crusade against the behaviours they want to change. They don’t say cop out things like ‘I don’t believe in politics’ as if the realities of relationships are equivalent to the tooth fairy. They engage their intellect to argue the case. They use their social skills and strong sense of what is right to bring people with them. They are courageous and willing to take a stand without ranting foolishly. And their time is now.

Several years ago I profiled an emerging executive. Next step group board and press exposure. Loved by his team, with a strong reputation for handling people respectfully and growing people from within, commercially strong, and esteemed in industry. He was the epitomy of the behaviours Rockefeller mentioned. This man was nonetheless viewed as insufficiently spiky, and too honest to have political guile. I pleaded his case with passion but he was overlooked.

Fast forward a few years. The economic down turn, the scandals, all mean the spotlight turned on his ‘gorilla’ managers and exposed their behaviours. Some are under investigation and have had various other very public sanctions applied. The good news however is my man’s time has come – he has made the board given his strength of morality, clean record, his courage and his ability to make the right calls.

For an uplifting article on great leadership and morale raising read D. Michael Abrashoff’s 2001 Harvard Business Review article Retention Through Redemption http://hbr.org/2001/02/retention-through-redemption/ar/1

Good guys and gals do get to the top. Let’s drink to that.

Sometimes things happen at work that make you realise that, whatever the good and clean lives people profess to lead, they often leave their morals and their manners at home. Every day I come into an office largely populated by high earning consultants, PAs definitely earning above the national average, and our corporate clients – the senior executives in the form of Managing, HR, IT, Finance, Strategy etc Directors of our noble FTSE100 companies. We’re mostly rather good at our jobs. We have shiny homes and large mortgages (or none). We have corian and granite works tops in our kitchens at home, and probably Villeroy and Boch bathrooms. We wear designer labels or clothes that look that way.

Apparently though we don’t know how to use a loo brush.

I thought maybe this was just a trading floor thing. A close friend found a turd neatly laid on the loo seat in the bathrooms off a top investment bank many years ago. This was in the heavy days of non-electronic futures trading when rumours also circulated about a LIFFE trader eating a sh*t sandwich for a £5 bet (he won). My friend had a mouse living in his desk drawer – it had chewed a hole through a series of research reports and built a nest. It then lived on food left around the place. Brokers sent in meals each day to the FX traders. There was always a ready supply of broken poppadums around the place. It was all generally a bit disgusting.

So the good and the great pass through our revolving doors each morning, ready to be put under the microscope. Yet the fear of the task ahead, and perhaps the simple time constraints of getting out of the house then getting here on time, mean that clearly morning ablutions are saved for arrival. This makes sense. The worst thing about morning commuting by tube, contrary to popular belief, is neither the crowding nor the body odour, but the vile stench of cologne mixed with a leaked peeping turtle fart. Heads firmly and deeply ensconced in the Metro. No dog to blame.

On arrival people head straight to the loos. They leave the stripes, the splatters, the slides. The sludgy whirl of half flushed paper.

I hope to god they wash their hands before they shake mine.

They definitely don’t look behind themselves and use the brush.

And here the metaphor shapes up. Roger Steare http://www.ethicability.org/ (sorry to mention you here Roger) has done extensive research on morals in the corporate world. One of the most interesting findings I think from his work is that even seemingly highly moral people from the perspective of their home lives often leave that part of them behind. Behaviour – from petty theft, ill manners, dubious decision-making – is fair game at work where it isn’t at home. And that is a worrying thing. We all need to challenge ourselves, our standards and when we let them go. Everyone deserves the best of each of us, even the poor buggers about to put you through the mill on the corporate couch.

Recent research by Kahneman and Deaton at Princeton demonstrates that happiness levels out at salary levels of circa $75k per annum. I think the normal among us can relate to a figure that doesn’t leave you scratching your head or indeed tearing your hair out, as to how you will on earth manage to pay a sudden [delete from following; obscene electricity / gas bill; sudden dental treatment; car breakdown etc] bill. Yes, it would be nice to be able to afford that random purchase of an Aston Martin, or to rent Mick Jagger’s Mustique property for a week in high season without a lurch in one’s stomach. But it’s nice to be able to pay the bills. And more is better for the frills.

But not my guy. Let’s call him Richard. Richard is a highflying city executive. He woke up at 3 am the morning of our executive profiling session to attend to a non-urgent client need – because that’s the way he is. Of course by the time he reached me he was ratty and hyper in that way toddlers are when they are overtired but don’t know quite how to manage themselves. Gabbling away like Jeremy Paxman on speed it soon becomes apparent Richard (1) has a large ego and lacks related humility (2) is neurotic and obsessive in a way that any client would love but his colleagues and family may be irked by and (3) has lost all perspective on life.

He reminded me of a colleague way back when whom no one had known to take a holiday in the previous 10 years of his employment. He took pride in sleeping under his desk during large deals. But he was a nightmare to work with – controlling, micromanaging, emotionally on the edge. He was forced to take a permanent break as even clients eventually spot crazy. His role was filled the next week. We didn’t mourn his loss and neither did the clients who apparently might have self-imploded without his permanent and ever ready presence.

In the course of our conversation Richard revealed to me that he earned £900k per annum (yes £900,000, not £90,000), owned three large houses all with fully paid off mortgages, and his wife was a partner in a GP practise (code speak for creaming it in). He offered this information gratis and as an aside to other questions. As I always do, I asked him: why he worked? what was his purpose in life? If he was passionate about his job? The bold and immediate reply, “oh, if someone offered me a pot of cash today I wouldn’t be doing this….. I would be gardening all day and enjoying my family life”. Of course this begged the following question, “Given you’ve just told me you earn £900k, you have 3 houses with paid off mortgages, exactly how much cash do you need to be given?”. He fumbled, he hoed and hummed but wasn’t really sure. Then he swiftly went off at some other tangent. He wasn’t prepared to go down this path so the magic number remains unexplored.

So folks here’s the thing…

–          Rule number one in life: you are dispensable – to clients, your organisation, and to nature most of all

–          If you have 3 houses you probably have enough by way of assets to redirect your energies towards some of the relationships that should actually matter (see http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html for top 5 deathbed regrets – profound yet simple stuff)

–          If you are a total nob and lack humility at least try to hide it… a little